New York Pt. 2
Letter #45: Thrilled to be back with some of my best friends and a love letter to Prospect Park.
7/14/23
Hilary and Andrei picked me up in Hoboken around 2pm that Saturday, June 3rd. I had just finished having brunch with Lindsay and her new pup, Riley. She gave me a tour of her stunning NJ apartment and we enjoyed the mild June weather while walking around her neighborhood.
I hadn’t seen Hil since December so I was sooo excited to give her a big hug. We picked up right where we had left off, picking on Andrei as we wound through the streets of Manhattan on our way to Bed Stuy in Brooklyn. Bob and Nicholas had packed some homemade (devilish) caramel brownies that Hil, Andrei, and I devoured in the car. Andrei scolded us for dropping crumbs in its pristine interior.
We reached Sasha’s apartment around 3pm. I dropped my bags off and we helped her lug some new furniture boxes up to the apartment. In NYC, so many of us live alone. So, when your friends come over, it’s all hands on deck to accomplish the difficult tasks that are nearly impossible to conquer alone.
It was great to be back in Sasha’s dreamy 2 bedroom apartment. She has open shelving and a butcher block counter top in her kitchen that give off an airy, Parisian vibe. We used to live together so it’s effortless to ease into her space. Her little pup, Mia, is now 13 years old, deaf, and losing some of her eyesight. But she’s as sweet as ever, and still just as skilled at ignoring you after she gets her first pets upon greeting.
Sasha and I caught up briefly, then followed Hil and Andrei over to Katlin and Thibault’s apartment. They had just moved into Ally and Lars’ old apartment in Bed Stuy, a beautiful 2 story brownstone with a dusty basement that my friends have allowed me to store my bike in for the past several years. There’s an awesome backyard, something that’s one of the hottest possible commodities in terms of New York housing.
Thibault is French, and—IMO—a brilliant chef (his parents run a bakery in Normandy, so, go figures), so it’s a dream to have him cook for you. Of course he had several meats ready to go on the grill—pork chops, sausages, hamburgers, etc. Katlin made her signature potato salad that has hardboiled eggs and red onions in it. There was corn on the cob, an arugula salad, and plenty of bottles of Prosecco.
I haven’t had that sort of childlike excitement in a while—I was so amped to spend the evening with a group of my closest friends in a place that I love so much. We laughed a ton—my greatest accomplishment in life is to make the most shocking joke possible to lead my friends to tears of laughter.
The following morning Sasha and I tried to sleep in. The jet lag still had a strong hold on me, so I was awake by 8am and decided to go for a run. Since Ally and Lars had lived in this neighborhood for the past 6+ years, I already had my ideal route. There were many times I stayed at their apartment and took their dog, Lucy, on my morning runs. So, I headed down Troy Ave. towards Eastern Parkway, then headed west towards the park. I turned around at mile 2 and headed back—Sasha and I planned to order a Seamless delivery of Nagle’s Bagels when I returned so I sped home. 🤤
I was having the most surreal feelings when I was on that run. New York, in all her glory. The trash, the heat, the incredible amount of diversity within a one block radius, the green spaces, the lack of parking, the never ending traffic, the booming sound systems, the guys smoking meat on the sidewalks, the wheelie bikers, the late morning brunches, the bodegas and their cats and their regulars, the weird outfits, the experimentation, all the possibilities, and all the heartbreaks, just stretching out before me on that parkway. I realized my love for NYC had not waned in the least bit.
The elation that accompanied that realization was thrilling. I had lived in this city for over 10 years. It was expensive and I worked so hard. I had many of the most memorable days of my life here, and also made many mistakes that broke my heart. And, yet, I wasn’t over it, not in the least bit. If anything, the 4 days I spent back in NYC with my best friends only further solidified what I knew was still true—I still want NYC to be my home in some way or another. Maybe it’s not my main place of residence, but would be well within the mix of my landing pads.
It is the most energetic, deeply heartfelt, and interesting place in the US…maybe in the world. I’ve traveled a lot and every time I land back in NYC, my heart beats so fast I think I might start crying. 😳
Anyway, this city still has just as strong a hold on me as ever. I felt oddly at peace with that feeling.
Hil and Andrei headed back to Philly that Sunday morning, and Sasha, Katlin, and I went to a going away party for a friend in Gowanus. Riding the subway again was so fun, so heartwarming, even though I had agonized for years about my daily commute on the subway for work. But now that I could just enjoy NYC without the stress of work, I was enamored by every aspect of getting around the city.
We ate at Nana Ramen that night as I had a terrible craving for their curry ramen, a dish Ally had introduced me to years ago. It warmed my belly, our convos warmed my heart, and we called it a night. Sasha would be working the following day, so Katlin and I planned to ride our bikes to Prospect Park. We all slept in, and I decided to go for another run and pick up yet ANOTHER bagel on my way back. This time at Bagel Pub, my very favorite bagel spot. 😍 To be fair, I hadn’t tried bagels in any of the other countries I visited, but it’s also not the food I crave constantly. So it seems better for me to just save the bagel indulgence for when I’m back in the home of bagels.
I headed over to Katlin’s later, dusted off my bike, pumped up the tires, and we leisurely made our way to Prospect Park. In 2020-2022, I lived in an apartment next to Grand Army Plaza, right across from the park. The rent was incredibly reasonable for the location—with the exception that the landlords were real stodgy with the heat in winter. I had later moved to Manhattan so I could walk or bike to work instead of the 45 minute commute on the train every day. I thought it would make me happier—it didn’t. And so, ultimately, I concluded that I had tried every angle to be happier at work and had finally reached the time for me to leave. That said, when I think about my NY life, that Prospect Part apartment is the first thing that comes to mind.
I loved hearing the brunch crowds at Cheryl’s Global Soul downstairs from my kitchen window. On Thursday nights they held live music sessions on the sidewalk so I’d open all my windows and let the sounds fill my charming studio apartment. The Saturday farmers market lasted all day and all I had to do was cross the street to buy 2 weeks of fresh product, the occasional bouquet of flowers, and a bottle of fresh apple cider. 😍 I’d run around the park anywhere from 1-4 times a week, depending on what type of gym membership I had at the time. At least one day every weekend I’d try to get down to the park to lay out, read, journal, and make plans for the future. There was a jazz band that set up every weekend, so I could watch them while sunbathing. I got outside a lot when I lived across from that park, so it holds a special spot in my heart. I miss it dearly, and if I ever move back to this city, that’s the spot I want to be in again. ❤️
So, naturally, that’s where I wanted to spend my date with Katlin. She had lived near the park over the years as well, so we met up there often. Katlin has been an interesting friend to me over the years—I don’t know anyone quite like her. We met when I lived with Sasha over on Gold Street. They’re best friends, Katlin living with another friend in the same building. So we hung out often, but were not yet close. She’s a character—a smiley, 4’ 11” Hawaiian that takes pictures of the most random things she sees on the street and sends them to me—they surprise me and make me laugh every time.
Years ago, she and I moved out of Gold Street around the same time and both moved onto Lefferts Place in Clinton Hill, about 1 block away from each other. Neither of us had laundry in our buildings, so I think I suggested we go on a date. We could put our laundry in at the huge laundromat a couple blocks away, then have dinner at the French restaurant next door (which has sadly closed since 2020 😥). And, so, this became a ritual for us every 2 weeks or so. Not every time were we able to get together, of course, but we tried to sync up our laundry schedules as best we could. That’s when our friendship began to grow. Katlin had begun a time of spiritual exploration in her life and would share what she was working on during our dates. I love having those kinds of conversations and I began to learn some things from her.
Her work was opening me up to start some spiritual exploration myself. And, as I did, I had a friend I could disclose any and all I was uncovering about myself and my past, and she supported and encouraged me along the way. There is not a judgmental bone in her body—she approaches your vulnerability with neutrality and love.
So we continued having our little dates, combining lots of laughter with an open support system for one another. Eventually we moved to different neighborhoods and our laundry facilities moved in-building for me, and in-unit for her. 🙏🏻
After our park date, we biked back to Sasha’s for one of our favorite evenings together—a Pét Nat wine from Manny’s and the one meal of Sasha’s that I crave the most, her stir-fried beef and kale over sushi rice. Its the simplest working man’s meal and yet is my favorite thing she makes. She doesn’t even have to ask me what I want for dinner anymore. I’ve asked her to make that meal for me so many times over the years that she just orders the ingredients over Instacart without consultation.
We enjoyed the dinner, wine, and conversation, and then Katlin departed around 10:30 so we could all go to bed. My flight wasn’t until 2:30pm the following day so I had all morning to relax and hang out with Sasha. We had coffee and chatted up until the last moment that I had to pack up my bags and head out. It was only a 10 minute walk to the subway for a total of maybe 45 minutes to get to JFK but my big backpack was weighing in at 49.1 lbs, and I still had my smaller backpack to wear on my front. I hand-carried a small shopping bag with rugs in it. I could feel my vertebrae crunching down as I walked through the airport—how do these Nepali porters carry 80-100 lbs on their backs with minimized oxygen…up a mountain?!
What I’m Reading Right Now…
I just finished Purple Hibiscus by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. A fictional book about a young girl and her brother growing up in Nigeria, living under the roof of wealthy loving parents. As time goes on, the main character reveals that her father is religiously fanatical and leads a tyrannical home, affecting both siblings and their mother. It’s heartbreaking to read how a child’s home life can go so wrong, and illuminating to read her description of these Nigerian villages and how she and her brother evolve as they grow up. I loved it, flew through it, and highly recommend it!
Hey! Would you like to connect over creativity, self-growth, and problem-solving? Or just to have a virtual glass of wine or mocktail? Please book a time on my Calendly for us to chat! I can’t wait to see you. XOXO.
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What a[nother] wonderful homecoming, like a homing beacon after traveling the world! Love the words: “this city still has just as strong a hold on me as ever. I felt oddly at peace with that feeling.”
😭😭😭 I love you so much and am so grateful our laundry dates cemented our friendship and how that’s brought all our besties closer together! Also I laughed out loud about Andrei getting mad at the brownie crumbs in his car 😂