Pondering life in different places
Letter #87: Connecting my feelings for certain places to my personality profile.
10/26/24
Sasha mentioned something interesting to me over text when I first arrived in Mexico. She was curious what my thoughts would be in spending this much time in Mexico after spending so much time in Italy.
For so long Mexico has been the apple of my eye, the place I dreamed of moving to and settling down in. But over the last two years Italy has creeped its way into the #1 spot in my heart.
Is it just me and my wild imagination in picturing a life somewhere else, or is it the actual places that captivate me?
I have the seeming unwavering ability to allow my imagination to grab ahold of me no matter where I am—Philadelphia, Madrid, Los Angeles, Tuscany, Albania, Mexico City, or back in the heart of Brooklyn—and conjure up a life in that place, calculating what I’d have to do to make it happen.
And just as soon as I devise a game plan, tell my closest friends about my latest idea, I travel to the next place and my imagination sets off again.
I do want half my life lived in another country (the other half back in the U.S.), but feel I have plenty of time to figure out where I want that to be. I guess I’m back in Mexico to find out if it steals back the #1 spot from Italy.
I read in a blog the other morning to look for local restaurants that serve comida corrida—the menu of the day. It’s an inexpensive way to experience a more “authentic” dining experience than choosing one of the touristy places along Quinta Avenida in Playa del Carmen. So I’ve been walking further west towards 30 Avenida Norte, searching for one of these restaurants.
I found one Saturday morning and was offered huevos con frijoles y arroz, with unlimited refills of agua fresca—jamaica. The meal came with freshly warmed corn tortillas, and I did my best to put my phone away to to enjoy the meal and watch the other people coming and going around me. Although it was tempting to continue searching on Google Maps for more comida corrida restaurant options.
I watched the traffic at the intersection out front, pickups stopping by to drop off goods for the convenience store attached to this modest restaurant of only 2 tables, an open kitchen, and a cook that also serves the food.
There was no doubt I was in an area toeing the line of where the tourism ends and real life begins. And with that is the visually undeniable truth that Mexico is, in some ways, still a developing country.
The mess of electrical wires at eye level along the street, trash accumulating along the highway just at the edge of the beautifully lush jungle beyond. The haphazard way buildings are put up, but the natural world around them not preserved.
It’s nothing I can fault an entire country for—I only recently am learning more and more about the U.S.’s meddling with so many other countries’ affairs in both Central and South America. To fault any one of these countries for their lack of resources or misuse of funds or corrupt leadership also requires me to ask how has the U.S. contributed to this corruption, how has the U.S. exploited the land, the resources, and the people, leaving that country worse off than before?
But, all of that aside, I had a flashback to my DISC profile while enjoying this lovely little breakfast. The DISC is a profile my dad uses as a leadership and communication tool for all of his clients, of which we use openly and daily at Sage Legal Group.
As an Expressive Driver (highly relationship oriented with a “get shit done” attitude), my dominant motivator is AESTHETIC.
“A high aesthetic score indicates a relative interest in ‘form and harmony.’ Each experience is judged from the standpoint of grace, symmetry, and fitness. Life may be regarded as a procession of events, and each is enjoyed for its own sake. A high score here does not necessarily mean that the incumbent has talents in creative artistry. It indicates a primary interest in the artistic episodes of life.
She is in tune with her inner feelings and likes surroundings that complement these feelings.”
Recalling this sent a light bulb off in my head. If I were to settle down in Mexico, I wouldn’t want to just choose a condo 2 blocks off the beach in Playa del Carmen, where the space has been completely built around tourism—it doesn’t feel like something I’d authentically connect to.
And yet, much of what I’ve seen in the authenticity of “real Mexico” clashes with my dominant motivator of aesthetic (save for CDMX, of course). My inner desire for things to be symmetrical, clean, and orderly. Or is that just my U.S. affected mind so strongly influenced by our orderly society?
I think that’s why the love for Italy came so easily to me. The infrastructure feels more established, the form of the architecture often following the aesthetic of the land around it.
The history and culture in both Italy and Mexico is so rich, so colorful, so delicious, so beautiful. I could cry thinking (from a creative person’s perspective), how dreamy it would be to be surrounded by either of these landscapes and cultures for long periods of time.
But it was easy for me to picture a life in Italy because of how naturally harmonious things are there, not just in the touristy areas.
Am I making broad generalizations? Absolutely. I’ve been to Mexico eight times now, and many times I visit the same areas (CDMX, Taxco, Playa del Carmen), so there is so much of the country left for me to explore. I’m not ready to give up on this dream—I still need to experience the northwest!
I’ve been to Italy three times now for a total of about five months, from the north to the south, and no doubt there are areas hit with economic hardship, thus demonstrating a straying from that form and harmony evident in more affluent areas.
I simply am trying to find the future place for myself through reflection and further diving into my personality and why I feel a certain way in certain places.
Another gem? Turkey. The food, the textiles, the landscape, the culture—incredible. Got any other must-go-probably-want-to-move-there places for me to check out? Let me know! ❤️
P.S. One prop I must give? The beaches in Playa del Carmen are incredible. So well-maintained, clean, enjoyable, open to the public. They are far superior to most other beaches I’ve been in the world.
Hey! Would you like to connect over creativity, self-growth, and problem-solving? Please book a time on my Calendly for us to chat! I can’t wait to see you. XOXO.
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